SSL certs is so easy with let’s encrypt, that really shouldn’t be a blocker.

If you want something easy I think you have your answer with Signal

If setting up TLS is too much work, better stay with a service. Signal is nice.

Most people use either Matrix or XMPP. Both work.

There is a nice overview of chat protocols here: https://www.messenger-matrix.de/

I mostly use matrix as of today. I think it's alright. It's a bit difficult to explain encryption and device verification to other people... I think that could be designed better. But apart from that it works very well. So does XMPP which I've used before that. Have a look at the messenger matrix and all the options before deciding on an ecosystem. I'd take one of the friends and do some evaluation before dragging the whole group in. You can do that with some pre-existing servers before learning how to host the server part.

And btw: With most of them you can just use some public servers. You should do that unless you're willing to put in the effort to maintain an own server. That'd give you complete control over the infrastructure... But it's also a liability to maintain a server, do the updates etc for a group of friends and maybe years to come... End to end encryption will keep the content of your messages private, anyways. (If you use it.)

I have already looked in XMPP, but it required SSL certs and I did not have the mood to configure them.

There are definitely XMPP clients that do end-to-end encryption that do not rely on TLS for key exchange, though.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Off_the_record_messaging

Off-the-record Messaging (OTR) is a cryptographic protocol that provides encryption for instant messaging conversations. OTR uses a combination of AES symmetric-key algorithm with 128 bits key length, the Diffie–Hellman key exchange with 1536 bits group size, and the SHA-1 hash function. In addition to authentication and encryption, OTR provides forward secrecy and malleable encryption.

The primary motivation behind the protocol was providing deniable authentication for the conversation participants while keeping conversations confidential, like a private conversation in real life, or off the record in journalism sourcing. This is in contrast with cryptography tools that produce output which can be later used as a verifiable record of the communication event and the identities of the participants. The initial introductory paper was named “Off-the-Record Communication, or, Why Not To Use PGP”.[1]

I’ve used Pidgin with the libOTR plugin that implements that protocol.

snikket.org is the easy to configure XMPP server, but it still needs SSL certificates. But that’s fairly easy to do with Snikket AFAIK.

Or you could simply ask the Snikket developers to host a server for you for a small fee. If you are US or Canada based jmp.chat is also a great service, and it includes a free Snikket server as an add-on.

Simplex is an option, you can host your own servers and it has crossplatform GUI + CLI

I think it’s pretty cool, and it’s pretty easy to set up (there are a lot of options you may wanna look at though)

simplex.chat

github.com/simplex-chat/simplex-chat

Rocket.chat could be an option

Acronyms, initialisms, abbreviations, contractions, and other phrases which expand to something larger, that I’ve seen in this thread:

[Thread #980 for this sub, first seen 19th Sep 2024, 20:25] [FAQ] [Full list] [Contact] [Source code]

Use XMPP. Thanks to Let’s Encrypt being implemented in basically every reverse proxy, setting it up is a matter of seconds.

I hear XMPP through Snikket is pretty easy. I just used prosody though

I’m considering Zulip

zulip.readthedocs.io/en/latest/…/install.html

Signal is more likely to have more mass appeal. Matrix can bridge just about anything but is (IMHO) a pain to setup the first time. XMPP is reliable and available just about anywhere. I use the first two.

Ask your friends though.

What about p2p messengers?

• jami.net
• briarproject.org
• tox.chat

something end-to-end encrypted.

required SSL certs and I did not have the mood to configure them.

…right…

Did you look into snikket? It’s XMPP-in-a-box.

i was trying to find a link to Apache’s chat server that we used to power cruise ship chat applications w/out internet. i didn’t find it but this list i found has some neat projects listed, so i thought i would share that at least: medevel.com/26-os-chat-servers/ (no affiliation)

TL;DR - use Signal.

Re: self-hosting – go for it! The DIY route is an excellent learning experience, so this is the way to go if you want your own privacy-friendly chat service. There’s quite a lot to achieving “privacy” and “security” though (heck, even defining these is challenging)… have you self-hosted before? How important are service quality / speed / reliability, backups, mobile + desktop? Will the folks you want to chat with use/like it too?

Re: Signal – definitely check out this app as well. They (the Signal Foundation) take privacy very seriously. Messages are only stored on devices running Signal, and they are ephemeral by default. Actually, that’s a good thing to consider: How important are durable / offline archives of your chats, useful with other tools (like grep?). Signal makes offline archiving difficult by design (for the sake of security/privacy).

Note that Signal is technically self-hostable, but I gather this is very difficult.

I self-host Nextcloud and I use Talk. I don’t love it, but I do find it useful for some things. Flipping on Nextcloud is pretty easy, but it is challenging to make it secure, reliable, fast, etc. And you still have to convince others to use it.